Sorry I'm not sorry about my super-heavy blog post yesterday. It feels so good to get that off my chest and to have had so many of you reach out to me with so much support and love. Blogging is such an amazing thing sometimes.
I'm not one of those people that pisses rainbows while farting skittles and burping cotton candy. I pride myself in being a pretty real person. I'm grateful that I have people who appreciate that and still like me despite being crazy.
As I laid in bed last night, I was thinking about the post and feeling the weight of all of those feelings. Every night, Bradley, Chordie and I are all snuggled together in one big spoon-train where Chordie is first, then me, then Bradley. Laying there in between my dog (who is my best friend) and my love, I felt so safe and secure. Which brings me to the most important man in my life; My Bradley.
Having the kind of Dad that I did, it's hard for me to trust a man or feel safe with them. But with Bradley, it doesn't occur to me not to. When we lay in bed together at night, I feel like I have the whole world surrounding me and I could not feel any more full or satisfied with life. Sure, 95% of the time I want to strangle him for various reasons, but I still love him despite it all.
You see, we are by no means a perfect couple. There are so many things we are working on, and so much we still need to learn about our relationship. But we still try each day to be better. He stood outside in the freezing cold last night using his shitty hand-me-down tools to fix my car. He reads my blog everyday and he caters to my obsessive cleaning habits. This weekend he took me shopping and yesterday he went to the store to get another pizza for me because he ate the majority of the first one. He means the world to me, and I don't want to think of a day without him.
I couldn't chose my Dad, but I could chose my future husband. I'm so, so happy with the choice I made to pick my Bradley.